Your work is more than a paycheck because you value your relationships. You appreciate the special role you play in people’s lives. You want your advice and support for clients to matter to them – both personally and practically.
And yet….
It is easy to get caught up in the functional side of your work. Your expertise can feel like a barrier. It can be difficult to find the right times and the right topics to engage beneath the surface of your professional duties.
You also worry that your clients see you primarily as a problem-solver. There is the risk that your efforts on their behalf are transactional and not viewed as meaningfully as you would like.
This illustration shows a hierarchy of Client-Advisor relationships from performance to purpose:
The pull of gravity in an advisory relationship is towards “What / Where” – tasks that are important but don’t impress. Depending on your field, you can file taxes, deliver a portfolio, evaluate an insurance policy, or offer a trust document. These skills are essential but not inspiring.
Having a “How” engagement reflects a stronger connection. You genuinely are helpful in addressing your clients’ stated objectives. You listen to their goals and align your advice to produce success. Even so, the process may not address the underlying significance behind their plans.
“Why” relationships are the ideal. You are aligned with your clients and provide guidance that they truly value and appreciate. Your professional skills not only are functional, but they also support your clients’ personal fulfillment. You are considered essential and indispensable.
The “Why” Level Is Difficult to Reach.
“Why” involves substantial engagement about issues at the center of the client’s life. It incorporates emotional considerations (heart factors) and intellectual ones (head factors).
In many cases, “Why” draws into spiritual elements at the center of who the client is. These beliefs may derive from religion or from some other source. You may share their inspiration. Yet you have the nagging feeling that these important values are not being addressed in your work for them.
The reality is that an advisor can engage productively but superficially with a client for years and never reach “Why.”
Of course, you don’t want to make an unwelcome push into your client’s private world. “Why” requires an invitation from them to you. Otherwise, you may judge it safer to stay at the surface and to deal only with the basics: the numbers in the financial statements or the language in the legal documents.
But data and text by themselves need not – and even should not – be the sole point of your work. At best, they represent “What” and “How.” They are the means by which something more important can be accomplished. The point of the process should be the end results that your client truly cares about. These goals lead to “Why.”
WISEgenerosity Is an Answer to the Advisor’s Challenge of “Why.”
Clients with the most fully developed purpose have giving at the center of their lives. Their use of money aligns with their fundamental beliefs. Their resources exist in service to their relationships. Their consideration of and care for others are reflected in their family, their work, and their engagement with their community. Sharing what they have – and doing so thoughtfully and effectively – is central to who they are.
Generosity fully expressed encompasses all of a client’s life. It is Possessional (money and stuff), Personal (time and talent), Social (hospitality and civic engagement), Emotional (accessibility and vulnerability), and Relational (everything else together and more).
Whether or not clients view themselves as “generous,” voluntary or involuntary giving will determine what happens to their resources. All of their assets will pass to others eventually. Ideally, their values and priorities will determine how and where their money is used.
WISEgenerosity provides a framework so that you can guide your clients to a strategy of giving that is Well-grounded, Inspired, Satisfying, and Effective. This process enables you to help them match their outcomes with their ultimate goals.
WISEgenerosity Invites You In to Learn What Matters Most to Your Clients.
The most successful families produce thriving, loving relationships and available, useful resources across generations. In such situations, time, talent, and treasure are invested internally to support each family member and to enable them to reach their potential through education, personal development, shared experiences, and professional opportunities.
Successful families also share assets externally through charitable and philanthropic giving. These outside investments express the family’s values and provide common causes around which family engagement is nurtured and maintained.
Exploring generosity is a sure way to learn about a client’s “Why.”
I’ve engaged with many generous people during this WISEgenerosity project. I typically began by asking them what causes they cared about and how they got involved with them. The resulting stories were intimate and amazing. I learned about loves and losses, about childhood experiences and inspirational figures. I heard about the highest highs in life and the lowest lows. In each case, I was invited into private, personal spaces – into “Why?”
During one such conversation with a couple I knew from shared volunteer service, I realized after 20 minutes of discussion concerning giving that I had learned more about them than I knew about some clients that I had worked with for 20 years. This was a revelation and an opportunity to become a more “Why”-focused advisor myself.
WISEgenerosity Makes Your Work Matter.
Giving is a superhighway to our innermost selves. As an advisor, it is the area where you will learn the most about your clients in the least amount of time. Best of all, it is not awkward or invasive. People love to talk about the causes they care about – and why they care about them.
WISEgenerosity aligns heart and head. It connects money and meaning. It enables success to produce significance. Ultimately, it gives you the opportunity to do your highest and best work for your clients and to enjoy the full rewards of your service.
Some of your clients already may be living “Why” lives. They are generous at home and in the community and have a well-developed sense of purpose. In these cases, you may learn more from them then they will learn from you.
Other clients may not have their “Why” well-developed. They are seeking more purpose and direction, often during transition points in life like selling a business, or retiring, or welcoming new family members. These are precious opportunities for them to benefit from your counsel and advice.
This blog is the first of a series about generosity being the surest path to developing even more fulfilling relationships with your clients. The W.I.S.E. Giving Process we will explore is designed to start with “Why” and to connect purpose and productivity to resources and relationships.
The WISEgenerosity tools that follow will help you get to “Why” with your clients. Using them will enable you to deliver Advice That Matters. These resources likely will enhance your own life as well – they certainly have done so for me.